46

Song Title: Without You
Artist: David Guetta
Age at time of Song Memory : 16
Current Age: 16

Song Memory: I can’t listen to it anymore. I don’t think I ever liked the song much, anyway. But it did seem like the right song for us. It was our song, after all. It made me happy when I heard it, like driving on an open road, music blasting happy. Funny how warped things are now. I believe intensely that a song can bind two people together. Every time I hear it I’m hit with a rushing wave of memories of us, and I know that the same happens to you. The first thing I feel is pain. The pain of hunger, that emptiness in your stomach that can only go away with one thing. Yet food will never help that pain. The only thing that could help it was you, but you were gone. The second thing that comes is a deluge of emotions. Pure sadness. Then passion. Passion that I felt with you. Finally, come memories. The night we broke up, watching you walking away through the darkness, then me yelling “I love you” from my car window before it was too late. Then you not saying it back. That drive home from your house, sobbing and screaming at God who, at the moment, I doubted even heard me. Heat wrapping me in a blanket and forcing me to sweat from my emotions. Me telling you in my car that I needed to leave, but couldn’t, because then I’d know that the end was actually happening. Then finally, a feeling of wasted time. Now I know it wasn’t a waste, but that didn’t change the thoughts right then. Almost a year had passed, and grief is what I got from it. But I did get one more thing, and that is this song. I’ll always have it to create our memories and my feelings like they’re new, even if we never speak again.

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